me, reaching into my dresser drawer for black pants: I hope this isn’t the pair with big holes worn in the inner thighs
Marie Kondo, gently over my shoulder: why is a pair of pants you find unwearable still in your dresser drawer
me: oh shit that’s right!! The dresser is for clothes that under some circumstance I might conceivably wear!!
Marie Kondo, beaming proudly: Yes, that’s correct!! These pants must have been your favorites. How wonderful that they were so comfortable and practical that you wore them out. But now since they no longer function as pants, you should move them from the drawer where you keep your functioning pants!
me: Yes thanks I got it they’re in the fabric basket now
Marie Kondo, fading back into the darkness: I love what you’ve done with the kitchen!!
The notion of KonMari as some creepy semi-embodied but entirely benevolent spirit, like a well-intentioned Bloody Mary, is so perfect and wonderful.
Marie Kondo has the same powers but the exact opposite energy of the Duolingo Owl.
YES.
Marie Kondo: Your room isn’t very clean, but that’s okay, I love mess! Does this spark joy?
Duolingo Owl: I wrote the ransom note in Spanish, and if you have to use Google Translate to read it, your kid gets it. You broke your streak. I’ll break your neck.
Marie Kondo holding your child, while standing on the remains of the Duolingo Owl : The Bird did not spark joy
(via teenagerposts)
Okay yes Romitri
BUT
Random girl in club?
With all this talk of what tracks might and might not be on the calendar in the future, I propose this:
Let the drivers choose 1 race each. 20 races is enough. There are rules though.
1) They choose in the order of the previous season’s championship. (Rookies go last in the order of when they were announced)
2) They cannot choose the same track as someone else.
3) They cannot choose a track in the same country as another already chosen track.
4) The choosing is done LIVE ON YOUTUBE the morning after the FIA prize giving gala thing. So potentially hungover.
5) They can do as much research as they want beforehand and have input from their teams, but the moment they step into the Race Picking Brunch no further communications with their teams is allowed.
6) Drivers can be lobbied by tracks, fans, nations or whatever, BUT nothing that would be considered bribery can take place. No exchanging of money, goods or services. Eg, If Vegas wants a street circuit race, they’ve got to argue the idea on MERIT.
7) The calendar is then organised from those 20 picks with only three factors considered. A - climate being appropriate to race in. B - climate change, so that the travel is as efficient as possible. C - F1 staffs health and safety. Mental health as well as physical health.
I just think it would be super chaotic and totally unfeasible but fuck, we’d get some good races. Plus, I think the live broadcast brunch aspect would be hysterical.
Edna Mode has all the vibes of a villain but is actually good and that is why she is one of the greatest characters in any super hero movie.
(via equalstrashflavoredtrash)
